How would you go about asking someone to be your mentor in a non-weird way?

A simple ask takes the pressure off. The best (and non-weird) way to ask someone to be your mentor is to email them, let them know why you admire their career, what you’d love to learn from them, and see if they’d be willing to let you shadow them for a day. This is a great way to show your mentor-to-be (hopefully) that you value their time and that your ask is not a big one. During your shadow day, you can develop a great conversation and relationship with them and see how you feel. Maybe you don’t like the role, maybe you’d like to shadow them more or maybe you’d like to set up a weekly coffee date with them. Get your foot in the door by asking your mentor-to-be for a very simple and easy ask, and then go from there.

If finding the right mentor were as easy as saying, "Will you be my mentor," everyone would have one. But, that's not how most people work. You need to warm someone up to the idea of mentoring you for the long haul. Think of it like dating. In today's culture, most people would run for the hills if you asked them to marry you on the first date. They want to get to know you first, to see if you're worth taking seriously for the long term. When you have your eye on a mentor, start by asking them for a small piece of advice. Offer to buy coffee, or lunch, and talk about a very specific problem you're trying to solve. Be authentically grateful for whatever time or advice they choose to give you, and suggest that if they're open to it, you'd like to get together again. If they find the time as rewarding as you do, then you'll naturally fall into a mentor/mentee relationship. After a few sessions, ask if you could set a regular time to meet up each week. If it's a fit, they'll say yes.

The least "weird" thing to be is being genuine! When reaching out to a prospective mentor start by telling them why you value their expertise and judgment. Go into where you want to grow within your field and how their insight could really help you. People for the most part want to help you where they can, and being genuine with your intentions will take you so far.

There's obviously a clear reason why you'd like someone to be your mentor and it could be anything from their mindset and approach, their work ethic, or the contributions they've made to their industry. Whatever it is that stands out to you, be open and authentic in communicating this to your prospective mentor and why you admire them for it. It'll be a lot less weird when there are heartfelt emotions involved.

Leaders are very generally very busy people and do not usually wish to add any more stress to their lives, so asking a potential mentor to meet over a cup of coffee is a great way to break the ice. Between phone calls, emails, and other demands, sometimes joining someone out of the office is a welcome break, and provides a respite in which they will let their guard down. By asking a potential mentor if they would join you for a cup of coffee so you can ask them a few questions, more often than not, they will be happy to do so as it does not represent a significant commitment. If the two of you hit it off well, you can ask if they would be willing to meet you again in the future, which can eventually lead to mentorship. In easing them into the role and providing them the opportunity to get comfortable, you can ask them to be your mentor in a non-weird way.

Your energy introduces you before your words, so prime your smile and raise your vibe before approaching your desired mentor. Be specific about what you want to learn and emphasize that you are willing to work hard to make the mentorship equally successful. Take time to prepare for any questions the potential mentor may have about your experience or goals. By alchemizing your mood to one of joy and inspiration, you can avoid being awkward or pushy and increase your chances of forming a successful mentorship relationship. Good luck!

Everyone requires a mentor to assist them navigate through life. However, our questions might be a little strange at times. I feel the most effective method to approach them is to be as subtle as possible. As a result, people will not feel obligated to say yes, giving them greater flexibility of choice. Finally, whatever their response is, never take it personally, and if they do not respond, follow up on it once but do not pest them.

If you can build a good rapport with the person first, asking them to mentor you may not seem as awkward or out of the blue. Befriend someone you admire and who seems to carry a lot of wisdom. Gradually get to know them rather than bothering them with too many questions. Then, by the time you officially ask them to be your mentor, they will have already gotten to know you and the things you are going through, making the transition into being your mentor feel natural and easy.

Be specific about what you desire from your mentor. This way, you can set the right expectations about your goals and expectations for the mentorship. Once you know what you want out of the mentorship, you can better articulate your request. If you want to master a skill or professional area, explain that. If you want to build confidence in a specific area, explain that too. It’s best to have a clear, actionable request rather than a vague one. Ask the person that you’d like to have them as your mentor. If they agree to be your mentor, be sure to thank them.

One of the best ways to ask someone to be your mentor is to give them a reason to say yes, so be prepared to answer any questions they may have about you, your motivations, or your goals. They may want to know more about your career aspirations, why you’re seeking mentorship, and what you hope to gain out of it. Explain what it is about their experience or expertise that you admire, and why you think they would be a great mentor for you. Be specific in your request, and let them know how you plan to contribute too since it’s a two-way street. It also helps if you’re confident and enthusiastic in your request – people are more likely to say yes if they see that you’re truly passionate about the opportunity.

Your mentorship ask shouldn’t be a cold sale but something that grows naturally from a budding professional relationship. If you’re interested in the possibility of mentorship with someone, start by asking them if they have time to help you with a quick bit of advice. You could say, “I hear you speaking about X in your career, and I’m going through something similar. May I bounce a quick question off you?” Don’t jump right into the question until you’ve asked if you can - you must respect their time above all else. If they’re receptive, keep in touch and build that professional friendship. You’ll know when the time is right to ask for a full-blown mentorship because you’ll feel comfortable with them and confident that they will likely say yes.

Talk to your potential mentor about the specific reason you think they are the right mentor for you. For example, if you're thinking of changing careers, point out that you know they've made a similar career change in the past and you'd like some guidance on how to do it. Ask them about their own career change experience, as well as what skills they think you need to acquire and the process you should follow to reach this goal.

If you’re thinking about asking someone to be your mentor, it’s almost certainly because you respect and admire them. And you don’t gain that level of respect without some level of serious interaction, where this person has probably already given you some sage advice at some point. So my best advice is to wait for your next conversation with this person, and then ask them to be your mentor on the heels of that talk. Make it seem like a natural follow-up. You can say something to the effect “Amy, I was just thinking about our conversation yesterday. That’s the third time you’ve given me some really solid advice. I’ve been thinking about that, and wanted to know if you’d be open to being my mentor? You’ve been spot on with everything and I feel like I could learn a lot from you.” It really is that simple. It doesn’t need to be awkward or forced. Just ask as a natural follow-up.

Much of the weirdness in establishing this relationship comes from a lack of understanding of what is being asked of the mentor, so to avoid this be extremely specific. Most people are flattered just by being asked to a mentor, but if you do not provide details of what you seek to gain, it makes you look unprepared and then the request looks wholly confusing and undesirable. Being specific about the information you are looking for, why you thought they were the right fit, what you can contribute to the relationship, and most of all, the time commitment you are asking them to obligate themselves to, can alleviate confusion. In being specific about what you hope to gain from the relationship and what they are being asked to provide, you can eliminate any weirdness and begin the relationship on a solid foundation of understanding.

If you are reading this, chances are you are not in high school anymore. When it comes to asking someone to be your mentor, just go for it. Best practices would include being professional and direct. By sharing that you are hoping to simply learn from this person, you can demonstrate that you are not trying to get any additional support, such as financial, for example. By being authentic in your request, you will show that you are being genuine and that you are in a place where you need and want support to grow.

It can be difficult to find a mentor, especially if you don't have any personal connections in your industry. One way to try to find a mentor is to reach out to someone whose work you admire. You could send them an email or a message on social media, and let them know that you're a fan of their work. Explain why you'd like them to be your mentor, and mention any skills or experiences you have that you think would make you a good mentee. Thank them for their time and leave room for the mentor to say no without the interaction being awkward or offensive.

It can feel weird to reach out to a mentor you don’t know by sending them an unsolicited message. Also, mentors who are successful and have a high profile in their field will receive hundreds of emails a day. You will have a much better chance of success if you get someone that the mentor already knows to introduce you. Look through your network of contacts and see if you know someone who can help you make the connection. When you’ve identified a suitable person in your network, make your request with the following message: “Hey [contact], I see you know [mentor]. S/he would be an excellent mentor for me because [give three reasons]. I’d be grateful if you could introduce me, so we can connect.” This makes it super easy for your contact to pass along your contact details, and thus more likely they actually will.

When you ask someone to be your mentor, you are asking them to invest their time and energy in you. So it’s important to be genuine in your request and try to show no weirdness. In addition to this, tell them the truth, even if it’s difficult to do so. Explain why you want a mentor, and be honest about the challenges you are facing. If you can show that you are serious about wanting to learn and grow, then the person you are asking will be more likely to say yes. Thus it is one of the best and most successful ways to ask someone to be your mentor.

Don't treat this question like it's a strange. It will be your habit of trying to hide your intention by beating around the bush, that will come off as weird more than the question itself. You can ask your would be mentor directly instead. Explain to them what you're looking for and why you feel like they have useful knowledge that they can impart to you. Don't be overly flattering or coercive, simple honesty will do. Don't be afraid to hear the word no, especially if your would be mentor doesn't want any sort of former mentor title. It's possible to start slow, by simply asking for advice and letting them decide what they feel comfortable advising you on. While it may seem difficult or even embarrassing, being upfront lets your potential mentor know what your looking for and gives them the chance to make an informed decision about taking you under their wing.

Keep it casual. Asking a potential mentor if they'd be willing to let you pick their brain sometime about your profession is one easy start. It's important to suggest a comfortable environment for this — nothing too fancy or too unprofessional. To avoid being weird, you need to avoid being aggressive. People high up in their careers don't always have time for mentoring, so if someone tells you they're busy, accept it and don't push. If they are willing to sit down with you, work with their schedule. This puts you in a good position to develop that mentor relationship down the line.