Hi, There are a number of important things to consider here. It is not about whether it is fair or not to allow the spouse who cheated to interact with people of the opposite sex. It is about what the partner needs while the healing and repair is happening. That may be small, medium or large requests to help rebuild trust. Some of these may be golden rules forever, and some may be relaxed or changed as trust is rebuilt. It is important to re-establish boundaries and be very clear about what is okay and what is not. For the person who was cheated on. The best way to move forward involves agreeing that the marriage that they had up to that point is finished and that they can now build a marriage that has much greater communication and ensure that both partners important relationship needs are met. The person who is cheated on cannot use this as a way of controlling the partner who cheated - that will only lead to disaster. A clear sign that it may not be worth staying in is if the partner who betrayed does not take full accountability and show a genuine sense of remorse for what happened before then looking at the why it happened.
Would it be fair to ask a spouse to no longer interact with someone from the opposite sex because they had a cheating past? We have had a few clients who have tried to insist that their partners no longer interact with someone they have cheated with etc. However, experience has shown us (along with surveillance reports), that they rarely adhere to this. For the person who was cheated on, what would be the best way to move forward with the marriage if they choose to stick it out? Most simply leave their partners or file for divorce. Trust is at play here and its rare, in our experience, for that trust to be fully restored. We have, over the years, placed many cheaters under surveillance on more than one occasion and have caught them cheating with different people every time. What would be one clear sign that the marriage is over and no longer worth staying in? When trust is gone, its gone and a cheater will invariably cheat time and time again.