One-on-one meetings are the easiest way to check the progress your employee has made or to see if a candidate is appropriate for the job. But when it comes to the mistakes a manager makes, I could count many. But the most common one that I have corrected myself for over time, is to not appear intimidating. It scares the employees and makes them believe that you feel like they are underneath you. It is not the environment that you are supposed to create at your workplace. So appearing intimidating is the worst way that one can go on in a one-on-one meeting. It is mostly a waste of time and unnecessary energy. Having a relaxed but appropriate body posture for the meeting is well appreciated by the employee who would be already nervous regarding the topic of the meeting.
There are times when managers get distracted in the middle of a check-in. Some suddenly have to take a call, send an email, or give instructions to another subordinate. This action can be frustrating and confusing for the meeting participant. Distractions make an employee feel less important. They might think: “Why would I trust my boss to help me grow when he or she can’t focus on the discussion?” Be aware of what distracts you and get rid of it. Give your full attention to the employee by asking questions and zeroing in on the topic. Engaging sincerely in the discussion builds trust and makes them feel comfortable having an open and honest conversation with you.
Managers often focus too much on ongoing projects and tasks. Remember that this is not a time to get "updates" but instead should be a time to really connect and build relationships. If you don't engage with the person and understand them, you won't have a good signal of what they need. One-on-ones are your opportunity to ask each person if they are getting what they need and how they can feel supported. Once you have this information, you can categorize how team members work best and provide them with the proper resources to work productively.
Most one-on-ones devolve into list reviews. Those lists may be open tasks, project updates or reports of blockages to getting an initiative done. This is a massive waste of the one-one-one. A one-on-one is the only dedicated time for both manager and employee to develop themselves. Instead of using it for administrative tasks that can be done easily via email or shared data, use it to grow your employee. Ask your employee to come to the meeting with a 6-month career or professional goal. In the meeting, discuss what it will take to hit that goal and whether he will need greater skill or ability to accomplish the goal. Co-create a plan to work on that area over the following 6 months. Then in monthly one-on-ones work on that area. Identify progress and create next iterations of growing the skill over the subsequent time frame. This approach will grow your employee into a far greater asset for the organization as well as invest in her future.
Content Editor at Castnoble
Answered 3 years ago
Hi! I am Chel Gacrama, Content Editor at Castnoble. Here are my thoughts on your query: One thing managers commonly get wrong with one-on-one meetings is not taking the time to really listen to their employees. When managers take the time to really listen, they can get a sense of what their employees are thinking and feeling. This knowledge can help them better understand their employees’ needs and keep them from making mistakes. In addition, when managers hear what their employees have to say, they can be more empathetic and supportive—which will make them much more likely to do things that benefit their employees like paying attention to details or giving feedback after an incident has happened instead of waiting until it happens again before intervening (which can cause resentment). I hope this added value to you. Warm regards, Chel Gacrama Content Editor, Castnoble
In my experience, one of the biggest missteps when it comes to one-on-ones is not taking any notes! It almost turns the meeting into a formality where neither party remembers what was discussed last time, action items etc. A good way to correct this is to create a running shared doc for each employee where either party can take notes - this then serves as both a starting point for each subsequent meeting as well as a reminder for any items that needed to be addressed/changed.
One thing that managers commonly get wrong with one-on-one meetings is not being prepared. This can often lead to the meeting feeling like a waste of time for both the manager and the employee. Managers should come into the meeting with an agenda and questions that they want to discuss. The meeting should have a purpose and not just be a time to catch up. If the meeting feels like it is meandering, employees will quickly lose interest and feel like their time is being wasted. This will help to ensure that the meeting is productive and that both parties feel like they got something out of it.
The best managers have an understanding of their team members on a more individual level, and while there must always be a line of professionalism that's never crossed, it's important that leaders form an emotional connection with employees so that they can motivate them in the most specific ways possible. Strong leadership depends on the ability to connect, so if one-on-one meetings are kept entirely professional with no minutes spared for the personal, leaders are missing an opportunity to learn about their employees on a human level - in particular, their aspirations and ultimate goals. As said before, it's important that things don't get too personal, but a proper balance can and should be struck. Getting to know your employees makes for an empathetic leader, and one-on-one meetings are an excellent opportunity to do so.
One-on-one meetings tend to pound employees with a lot of numbers to digest, which removes human connection. Using analytics tools is one way to visualize and understand people better, allowing managers to see their team members beyond the numbers they provide. Leave the numbers to analytics tools and focus on the most important. An analytics tool can provide managers with better insights to make one-on-one meetings more successful. For instance, there could be a logical explanation for why an employee has very low metric scores this week, which managers must deep dive into.
One-on-one meetings need to be properly planned with an agenda. Possibly the most looked over thing is an agenda. We tend to think that one-on-one is straightforward as we are not dealing with a group and we need less structure. But without planning, you could end up dealing with awkward silences or focusing too much on specific work-related projects. One-on-one meetings are a time to engage with your employee on a more personal level - get to know what is important to them, what motivates them or are there any areas of difficulty. A one-on-one meeting should be about the employee and not focused on the organization. Putting points down in writing prior to the meeting will help keep you on track.
Making the conversation all about status updates is one common mistake managers make during one-on-ones. Managers should be mindful not to make the discussion a progress report by asking about updates on projects and tasks. One-on-ones should be a time to check in with the employee to see how they are doing professionally and personally speaking. Make it an avenue to discuss their growth and development in the company. Ask about their goals and challenges to know where the management can further support them.
Respecting both your own time and that of your team members is the driving force in holding productive one-on-one meetings. This involves everything from starting (and ending) the meeting on time, sticking to the schedule, and communicating effectively to keep the discussion flowing smoothly. Besides, you're a lot more likely to stay on topic and stick to the agenda when you know you only have a designated amount of time to get your point across.
Most managers only dedicate a minute or two to the warm-up phase in a one-on-one meeting. This stage is the first step wherein the manager commonly asks an employee how he’s doing or feels about his current position or situation in the company. Most managers would ask a few warm-up questions and proceed to the numbers. Lack of enough time during the warm-up phase can lead to frustration, mistrust, and false responses. Taking time for an employee to feel comfortable, appreciated, and listened to is crucial in this stage to smoothly transition from casual conversation to discussing business matters.
The biggest mistake I saw management make in one-on-ones was that they were incredibly inconsistent, frequently cancelled and felt detached. I have taken this as inspiration to make sure that one on ones with my team are a priority and are virtually never cancelled. Cancelling these meetings sends a negative message that the team member doesn't matter or isn't important. Also, these meetings are only effective if they happen at predictable intervals and follow a standard format, even if that includes time for casual, ad hoc conversation. It can be tempting to eliminate these meetings altogether if you are finding they feel like a formality, but I would challenge any manager with this belief to reflect on their sincerity and presence in these meetings. Are you actually invested and in the moment, or are you vaguely listening while going over your mental to do list? You get back what you put in to these meetings, and your team will be better for it!
One thing managers commonly get wrong with one-on-one meetings is that they try to accomplish too much. One-on-one meetings should be focused on building a relationship and understanding what is going on with the employee. Trying to accomplish too much can make the meetings feel like an interrogation or lecture.
One thing managers often get wrong with one-on-one meetings is using them solely for checking in on action items or the status of projects. One-on-ones should also be used to check in on an employee's professional development, wellbeing, morale, and overall feelings about work. It's equally important to give them the opportunity to bring up anything they want to talk about instead of having the manager drive the agenda each time. It's easy to get caught up in day-to-day things that need to get done and not be fully present in these conversations, so having prompts or reminders to zoom out and look at things with a wider lens can be incredibly helpful.
Nearly every manager asks, in every one-on-one meeting, for the employee's feedback on all aspects of their role and the business in general. It's a great way to get an idea of how the business is viewed internally, and it can help to make meaningful changes with working patterns, training, or working conditions. However, very often the manager will take this feedback, jot down some notes on it, and then, do nothing about it. If you value your employee's opinions, the best way to show this is by proving that you are listening to their concerns and making a concerted effort to make improvements. If you continually do not take action on feedback received, the employees will start to question the point of raising their concerns and will stop responding when asked for their opinions.
One-on-ones serve a crucial purpose for employees to feel seen, heard, and supported by their manager, who can provide critical feedback and help guide employees toward their career aspirations. Management should book one-on-ones with a purpose, avoiding senselessly recurring weekly meetings which can reduce team productivity and become an irritation rather than a fulfilling opportunity. Consider whether there is a good reason to schedule regular or recurring one-on-ones, and build an agenda leading up to each meeting. If the topics could be better discussed through a team chat app, take that approach instead and save one-on-ones to discuss more complex subject matter.
Doing too much of the talking and not asking enough questions of their employees. Whether it's constructive criticism or praise they're giving, managers should always give their employees an opportunity to share their thoughts on the matter. Whether it's a negative or a positive meeting, employees always deserve the chance to share their feelings, opinions, and their own feedback. When managers do this, they not only show their employees that they respect them, but they also may receive useful information for improving themselves.
One-on-one meetings are great for getting an employee's personal insight on working conditions, however, it is also an opportune time to create a personal connection with them. Keeping it all business creates a shallow and impersonal working relationship that can impede communication and reduce worker satisfaction. Managers should strive to build strong relationships with employees to reduce worker turnover and encourage productive working relationships. People are more honest and open with those they trust, and creating that bond with an employee will make them happier and more forthright about work-related topics.