We have all taken big swings and completely missed the ball. We have all second guessed ourselves. We've all had bouts of luck. We've all had emotional growing pains. Tell your truth. Authentic relationships are built by people who share their real life experiences. That's how you bridge the differences that often divide us.
A major part of being an impactful leader is developing an ability to have an “open to learn” mindset. In order to build authentic and meaningful relationships across race, gender, and personal differences, leaders must be willing to listen more than they talk, ask for feedback regarding management and communication preferences, and intentionally seek opportunities to learn about different backgrounds and cultures. This can be in the form of individual relationship building activities, team building exercises, and professional development seminars and conferences that highlight gender and cultural differences. Chelsea Jay, NCRW, NCOPE, CPCC Leadership Development and Career Coach www.chelseajayconsulting.com
Visibility, presence and openness are crucial when it comes to meaningful inclusion and connection. It’s important that different people are present throughout all levels of a business so that others are able to see the possibilities of their own trajectory within an organization. And of course, not all difference is literally visible which is why transparency and openness from leaders when it comes to their own backgrounds and personal characteristics can be so positively influential. Another way leaders can foster authentic relationships is to get involved in conversations around inclusion more directly. Cyclical feedback and initiatives like reverse mentoring are great ways for leaders to show real investment in diversity. Because these conversations really need to center those with lived experience, it’s vital that leaders show humility and a willingness to learn. Successful equity policy and practice should always be informed by the perspectives of marginalized people themselves.
The best leaders are the ones who want to understand things that are different or outside of their comfort zones. I feel that an employee will allow themselves to become open if they think that they are psychologically safe and that their leader is willing to understand who they are, not only as an employee but as an individual.
Differences are all the more glaring when focused on. This doesn't mean you can ignore differences, but setting clear goals beyond them and focusing on building teams around the skills that it takes to get there is the best approach to overcoming a deadlock of differences. Historically, only worthwhile goals have brought people together across antagonistic borders and differences. But when such "teams" were formed, it often resulted in the greatest of successes.
The current political climate has many leaders focusing on how to be more welcoming and inclusive in the workplace. One way to build more authentic relationships is by focusing your efforts on belogning. As a leader, reflect on how you intentionally cultivate a culture where all employees feel not only welcomed and included but as if they belong. If you're unsure about where to begin, start by reviewing those times you felt most included at work. Notice the commonalities that transpire and begin to implement a few in your workplace.
When leaders intentionally provide career support to team members of underrepresented groups, they contribute to their career advancement and create a foundation for an authentic relationship. Career support can happen in different ways, such as introducing people to your influential networks, offering high-profile opportunities and projects and mentoring.
As a people leader of over a decade, the best advice I can give other leaders is to listen to learn. Then galvanize action. By listening to learn you will understand where prejudice has made its way into your policies and practices. It will enable you to be the voice of change within your organization, and with that proof of commitment to change, you will build trust across the different demographics of your team.
It is a fact that in an organization, people naturally develop a certain group identity that usually surpasses the individual. Group issues impact one's behavior, building codes of practice linked to the workplace. In a team, each employee contributes directly to the successful development of the work. The employee's conduct and the leader's attitude influence the organization's progress and development. It also generates better assimilation of the organizational culture and eases the process of understanding the differences. Thus, developing and providing team dynamics and training that focus on understanding the way of thinking and acting of each one influence the nurturing of authentic relationships across race, gender, and other differences.
Authentic relationships begin with open conversations, which only happen when people come together—whether virtually or physically. In recent years, Employee Resource Groups have become the de facto way that organizations facilitate those conversations. In some companies, they are self-led by employees while others are organized by HR or internal communications. Either way, all such groups can benefit from the visible support of leaders. Through Town Halls, internal blogs, social posts celebrating their achievements, and much more, leaders can continually raise the profile of ERGs. They can stress what has been done already as well as asking staff what more they expect. By listening as well as supporting, leaders can grow internal awareness to make a positive difference.
Stay focused on DE&I initiatives. Encourage employees from all backgrounds to share their stories with their peers, including any obstacles they overcame to get where they are today, and how it’s shaped them. This creates an atmosphere where people feel comfortable being themselves, cultivates a sense of psychological safety, and makes it easier for people to identify common interests — and goals — with their coworkers. By fostering a culture where employees feel free to express themselves, you break down departmental silos that can stifle collaboration and ensure all voices are heard, and elevated.
People will warm up to anyone who shows a sincere intention to know them better. Sans all the judgment of the superficial and outside categorization. We are all one and the same. We eat, live, and breathe in the same world. We may have differences in color, creed, race, and others. But it should not stop us from accepting each other. We are already in the modern world, where things are changing fast enough. Space and distance barriers are now defied by the digital way of communication. We can already talk and laugh together via the many online apps that we can use. These are the paths that we need to follow. We need to work together, hand in hand, for a better future.
Hire a diverse workforce to build positive relationships that fosters equity, and inclusion. Having a diverse staff of employee's of different races, genders, ages offers unique perspectives. Better company decision making is achieved through diverse teams, therefore increasing overall company productivity. Creating a workforce that fosters equity and inclusion will ultimately sustain relationships authentically.
A great bond amongst the team may be created by removing the stereotypical thinking and categorizing works based on the interests, talent, and capabilities of the employee. Leaders should make sure that a self-contained team containing all those features is created so that it may handle extreme situations without any problem. Companies should also conduct different hackathons and internal competitions to ensure that people keep polishing their skills and correctly nurture them. Leaders should also encourage maintaining a holistic environment in the office such that each person feels that his view is valued and he is an integral part of the team.
Make your company’s stance on diversity, equality and inclusion (DEI) known to employees from the very beginning–within job postings–and be sure your team is regularly reminded of this stance after employment. Reiteration of your DEI policies is a simple, positive, and reassuring way to communicate to employees that your organization takes DEI seriously, and it will help team members consistently build and nurture authentic relationships across race, gender, age, and other differences. Employees who understand that DEI is important to your organization will be assured that inclusion is something they can count on as part of their employment experience.
Leaders can nurture authentic relationships across race, gender, and other differences by sending handwritten thank you notes. A handwritten note shows that you took the time to sit down and write a personal letter, and it makes any recipient feel appreciated and valued. A recent study showed that people who receive handwritten notes are more likely to remember the giver, compared to those who receive an email or a text. So if you want to make a good impression and build lasting relationships with your colleagues, clients, or customers, send them a handwritten thank you note!
Our dental lab has diverse employees of all ages, races, and backgrounds. One of my favorite relationships that have developed is the friendship between two of our employees. One is in his mid-50s, white, and conservative, while the other is early 20s, Mexican, and tattooed from head to toe. They act like best friends though and share laughs together while discussing hunting or fishing stories. They work great together and continue to complement each other's styles in workflows. This was all brought together by having a weekly lunch together as a company. People are relaxed when not in a work environment and when we cater lunch, our company comes together and sits down at the table. Everyone is required to eat together and we learn more about each other's personal lives this way. The topic of fishing came up and those two bonded immediately. Ever since productivity has shot up, and our lab is close-knit. It's inspiring to see the relationships built by breaking bread together.
Develop the habit of being genuinely curious about the different perspectives, customs, and lifestyles of people in your community. Not only will this make you a more likable person, but research has shown that taking a genuine interest in others increases your trait extraversion and actually helps you enjoy the socialization more than if you didn’t take the time to genuinely connect. To put it simply, when we take the time to nurture authentic and diverse relationships, our biology reinforces these community building characteristics by giving us a chemical boost in dopamine throughout the conversation.
A leader's commitment to diversity and inclusion is communicated through their actions and words, rather than simply sending employees on courses or hiring a diversity officer to appease the political climate. A trust-based environment for all communication has always been the bedrock of a high-performing workforce. Leaders can foster this type of climate by cultivating a positive attitude toward diversity, encouraging open communication about differences, and actively listening to employees with opposing viewpoints. However, a company needs to be transparent and upfront about its culture before hiring employees. There is no point in both parties continually battling if they expect different attitudes from each other. If an employee does not agree with company policy they should rather find work at another organization more suited to them. And employers should feel no obligation to hire someone who might be problematic to them because of their personal lives.
Discourse often arises when your employees feel as if you have "somethin hidden behind the curtain." This is why, to develop the most authentic relationships, leaders should be as transparent as possible. Whether this means sharing business goals, objectives and big wins at company meetings, or ensuring everyone is in the know about any changes in processes or current staff, this will help your team members actually feel invested in the company, and not like just another person filling a seat.